by The Inmate
The work environment has few sacred places left for the discerning employee. The Asylum’s Field Engineers are continually devising methods to get the most out of the “the human motor” as some employees were referred to in the late 19th century by the early pioneers of time-management. There is, however, one holy place left, a place where everyone is allowed to enter, a place where rank and position do not matter. It is nature’s way of forcing us to take a break, to relax a little and forget about the pressures outside those hallowed doors. But even this place, this last bastion of comfort and solitude is in danger. As I write, new designs are being considered to “encourage” employees to use, for their own benefit, every available minute. The Corporate Asylum’s crack investigative reporter, John Throne, has obtained, at great risk to several of his prized appendages, several proposals for these new designs by breaking into a secret vault at a Human Resources conference. Provided here are two of the proposals so workers can begin to prepare themselves for the future.
Studies show that men waste more time in the rest room than their women counterparts. Peeing seems to be more of a ritual than a necessity. This new urinal designed by Human Resources will motivate your men employees to be productive throughout the entire course of their workday.
The Conference Rest Room
The above is a brilliant time-saving conference room designed by Human Resources. Instead of interrupting important comments with trips to the rest room employees can now flip up the lid of their chair/toilet, pull down their pants or lift up their dress and have a seat. A great time on task resource for any corporation.
Artwork by Poodlestew