Trolling Be Like That

You're logic is flawed. You're Islamophobic!

I had an interesting exchange with a Substacker I follow who wrote an article with this title: “I’m Getting Sick and Tired of the Useful Idiots Pushing Hatred of Islam.” I’m not going to go into the content of the article because my article is going to be about how trolling works. Most bloggers and Substackers are most likely seeing trolls on their sites and in their comments. I’ve seen some on mine.

But this guy actually tried trolling me in his comment section. Let’s get started.

I responded to this Substacker’s essay with some questions because I do think that if you’re a Muslim there are definitely some questions you should be asking about the religion you belong to including, but not limited to, the texts and the person that Islam is based upon. My questions, however, were geared more toward the practical. Here’s my comment in full:

You’re missing the point. Those of us wary of Islam (no doubt you’ll call me Islamophoic[sic]) are not worried about their philosophical or theological beliefs. I don’t care about that. Here’s what I care about:
What is life like for women, children, homosexuals and lesbians in Muslim majority countries?
What is life like for Christians, Hindus and other religious people who are not Muslims in Muslim majority countries?
What is life like for Atheists and Agnostics in Muslim majority countries?
What kinds of punishments do Muslims face for breaking Sharia Law in Muslim majority countries?
Do people in France feel more safe now that 10% of their population is Muslim than they did 20 years ago?
Does a non-Muslim woman in London feel more safe in her city then she did 20 years ago?
Are the hundreds of Muslim No Go Zones across Europe a good or bad sign regarding Muslims intent on assimilating into Western Culture?
Does Jihad only mean “internal struggle” or might it also mean something else?
Why do Muslims refer to non-Muslims as Infidels?
Inquiring minds want to know.¹

This generated a long and polite reply by the author (I’ve exchanged comments with him before). The reply and another subsequent reply (another rather long one) had a strange feel to them. I do a lot medical research using AIs because my wife has had a chronic illness for decades and his replies sounded just like how an AI would reply. The first clue was that every question was answered and they were all answered in order. Just the sound of it (and I won’t repeat the whole thing) had an inhuman quality. For example:

You raise serious questions, and I’ll do my best to answer them. My info’s mostly secondhand, of course, but I’ll shoot straight.

and:

Hey again, appreciate the follow-up. I get that your questions were rhetorical, but they still deserved serious answers. You’re raising a valid challenge about no-go zones here as well, and I won’t dodge it.

So anyway, I took one of these replies and asked Grok if it thought it was AI generated. It said it definitely was. Another AI said it was probably a combination. In any case, I decided to ask the author why he was using AI to generate his responses:

This is a real question and I’m not going to judge you on it. I’m genuinely curious. Why are you using an AI to generate your responses? Maybe you’re using an AI to generate your entire Substack….I’m not going to try to figure that out….but I am curious to know why you are using the AI and not just responding yourself?….This of course assumes an AI is not involved in the whole process.

Now things began to turn. Up until this point he had been very courteous, but with the above comment he replied:

Interesting speculation you got going on over there, buddy. You weren’t an offensive jerk the first few times we conversed, several months ago. What happened? Thanks for the unintended compliment, BTW. Try again, get a cigar.

Suddenly, I’ve become an “offensive jerk.” The point here is that with any troll if you start to call them out on things and you get it right, a common tactic is to start name-calling and insulting. I’m an “offensive jerk,” but why? It’s because I called him out on the AI. Trolls don’t like being caught, they want to think they’re above that, that they are way smarter than the people they’re trolling.

As an afterthought, before I saw his above response, I added another comment relating to his Substack’s name:

LOL. “Nobody’s Substack.” That’s a big clue isn’t it?

Here’s where the real fun begins. I simply pointed out that his Substack’s name might actually be giving people a clue, in a satiric way, that it is written by an AI, “Nobody’s Substack.” LOL. I liked that idea, thought it was clever and when I wrote the comment, I was literally thinking it might be fun to talk to the guy behind it. I write a satiric site, my book’s title is in part “I’m Nobody,” but this guy might be working on another level, some high Quixotic satire. It genuinely intrigued me—not, however, for very long. Those three sentences generated this response:

Have you too gone to a hasbara training course? Seems like nearly everybody who has issues with the fact that Israel is guilty of war crimes, crimes against humanity, apartheid, and geocide[sic] always end up where you just went. Funny how that works. Me not hating Muslims for being Muslim must really get under your skin, eh?

Classic trolling. First the name-calling: hasbara. I had to look that up. Here’s a partial definition from Brave’s AI (see, I use AI too):

…a Hebrew term that literally means ‘explaining’ or ‘clarifying.’ It refers to the public diplomacy efforts of Israel and its supporters to promote a positive image of the country and counter negative narratives, particularly concerning the Arab-Israeli conflict.

What’s interesting about this comment is that I never in my comments mentioned Israel. In fact, I’ve felt like I don’t know enough about those historic, Middle East conflicts to offer my opinion, but questioning him about using AI apparently strongly indicates my unspoken opinions about Israel and Muslims. Who’d thought?

That’s another trolling tactic: in addition to name-calling just accuse someone of something and make them defend against a position they never held. I said nothing about Israel. I’m accused of ending up someplace terrible. Then I’m accused of hating Muslims. Recall that before I called him out on the AI he celebrated my “serious questions” and a “valid challenge” but now suddenly I’m a Muslim hater because I accused Mr. American Nobody of using an AI? There’s no connection, but that doesn’t matter. That’s how trolling works. It’s not logical. The point is to try to keep you off balance because in your head you’re going, “What?” and the general reaction is to want to defend yourself which drags you deeper and deeper into the rabbit hole.

It’s not worth it.

After that he upped his name-calling protocol invoking “useful idiot” from the title of his essay and called me “hasbara boy” a couple of other times. My sin was so egregious he quite quickly (3 hours later, mine took longer…but I don’t use an AI) posted a Substack “You’re an AI! The Latest Accusation Made by Those Who, Evidently, Can’t Write as Well or Much as They Wish” about the entire conversation. If you’re going to accuse someone of not writing well, you should probably fix the typo in your title. Not to mention, though I will, only one person made that accusation. That was me. So a more honest, descriptive title should have been,

“You’re an AI! The Accusation Made by The Inmate Who Evidently Can’t Write Well or as Much as He Wishes.”

Hope you get that fixed soon! You’re welcome, Buddy.

In that article Mr. American Nobody never mentions The Asylum or me, The Inmate, apparently protecting people from the Muslim-hating content he assumes is on my site, not to mention the scant content and my inability to write.

It’s too bad. I was hoping for a little publicity.

____________________________

PostScript

Here are the comments that American Nobody eventually removed from my Substack after my responses to him. Saved for posterity and all time because, after all, we believe in freedom of speech and freedom of expression and we fully support his decision to no longer associate with The Asylum.

AMERICAN NOBODY:
Hey dumbfuck, AI’s don’t make typos. That’s number one. Number two is that your apparently defending or denying war crimes, crimes against humanity, apartheid, and genocide. Plane and simple. Number three is your slow typing speed is not my problem. Number four is I’m right and you’re wrong on the actual content, which you refuse to address. Number five is that Israel is guilty of war crimes, crimes against humanity, apartheid, and genocide, like it or lump it Number six is wow, what a nifty trick you tried to turn here, turning all third person. Care to do that with yourself? Do you even have a clue as to what inhuman and criminal behaviors you are defending? Do you have any idea at all of how far off the rails the people of that rabid US military base we call Israel have gone? But you do you, pall. Keep demonizing Islam, just like a good golem would.

THE INMATE:

Thank you for your comment. I appreciate your interest in a rational, civil debate.

Friends and neighbors this is a typical trolling technique and I was waiting for it. I alerted Mr. Nobody to this post minutes after I posted it a couple of days ago. He waits until he’s pretty sure the traffic has died down then makes this comment with unfounded accusations. Here’s what to expect in the future from him and other trolls:

TROLLING TECHNIQUES!!

Don’t get sucked in.

DIVIDE AND CONQUER
Troller tries to get opponents to fight each other.

NAME CALLING
Troller calls people names without presenting any facts.

SIDETRACK
Troller tries to turn the discussion to something else.

RESISTANCE IS FUTILE
Troller tries to convince you it is useless to criticize or try to change things.

OPEN AND SHUT CASE
Troller appeals to science or some authority as if the issue has already been decided and you shouldn’t question it.

COMPLETE SOLUTION
Troller says it is up to you to prove everything beyond a shadow of doubt. I.e. the facts presented are not enough. Prove it with more!

EXTREMISM
Troller tries to get you to agree with something extreme or just posit something extreme to change the topic.

QUESTION MOTIVES AND/OR INTEGRITY
Troller accuses you of just wanting clicks or money or attention or whatever.

OFFENSE AS DEFENSE
Troller just acts completely indignant and offended.

STRAW MAN
Troller accuses you of something you don’t believe to change the topic.

INVOKES AUTHORITY
Troller claims they’re some kind of specialist or expert to shut the conversation down.

ACCUSES YOU OF DEFENDING A POSITION YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW YOU’RE DEFENDING
LOL. This is a great one. It’s like the question, “How often do you beat your wife?” The troller is saying, “I know you don’t think you believe this, but you actually do!”

WAITS FOR POST TRAFFIC TO DIE DOWN
Trolls will often wait for traffic to die on a post so they can post while regular readership is off doing something constructive. Some trolls do not want deal with dozens of intelligent readers.

LAST WORD
Trolls really, really want to have the last word. In their minds it gives the appearance that their comment was so profound no one dared respond.

Have a wonderful day, Mr. Nobody!

———————–

When dealing with trolls (often bots) don’t engage, simply explain the technique being used and post the above.

AMERICAN NOBODY:
Well golly gee wiz, am I a troll or an AI? Maybe you’ll be calling me something brand new next time, eh? Please do decide, oh ye who agitates for hatred against Muslims for being Muslim, thereby indirectly helping the criminal nation state called Israel, which is objectively committing war crimes, crimes against humanity, and genocide. You do that, pal. You do you. Nice little echo chamber you apparently live in. Apparently you didn’t get the memo; Americans don’t do that. We aren’t down with the “hate entire collectives” thing. That must really bum you out. You’re a jerk.

THE INMATE:
How deep is that hole now?

AMERICAN NOBODY:
You, idiot, are now banned from my feed. Goodbye.

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